June 2011
1 post
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the book of youth
out of boredom and a mix of horror and humour upon looking at my childhood pictures, i made this: the book of youth.
my awesomeness is a birthright.
May 2011
1 post
1 tag
(meh)
the first thing i feel is a reverse drip of chills up my arms. then, a rupture from my stomach, a sensation bursting from just above my navel through my diaphragm, filling my lungs with a cool warmth. i would then usually take a deep breath and the intensified pressure on my chest would press even harder, but in a calming way. deep surge of a smile-inducing giddyness would then follow as i exhale....
March 2011
2 posts
2 tags
all animals are created equal.
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the darkness is fleeting
i don’t think i’m too happy with the scanned result. no? what do you think?
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February 2011
6 posts
3 tags
the rite.
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a view of the sky from inside the room.
a badly broken ceiling turned into a full-on renovation at my aunts’ store, Akrea of Sanur. somehow got myself doing a pro-bono construction job.
do visit our other store at Monkey Forest Road, Ubud (about two-minute walk or ten-second drive after Alpha Mart on your right) (if you decide to drive according to the lane direction).
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(shhh)
(a very quiet road trip to the hills)
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"i want to learn how to love until i bleed...
last weekend i briefly visited home to do many unimportant things including documenting my old sketchbooks. it was quite an experience, the same way mothers would probably feel when they revisited their old disco days from yellowing photos. blood was an underlying theme in many of my sketches, apparently, as was being child-like and nearly innocent (i’m uncomfortable using this word,...
i sang johanna in your name
“i want to kiss you lightly on the cunt so i can speak in the language of your orgasm and think with the wisdom of your heat.”
i will be perpetually tracing your imprint on my pillow, the sunken valley of my pulsating heart, through the women who had failed you and the men whose hearts i had wasted, through my struggle to mention your name, to the sleepless nights we slept through...
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kuma: a selection
i had a picture with him when he was little (and i was, too, younger). i was wearing a yellow top. i’ve been trying to locate where i put that file as i loved how we look in it, but haven’t been successful. i think it’s in my old friendster account but, really, who still logs in to their friendster account these days?
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January 2011
1 post
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before we took down the tree...
christmas display at my aunt’s store in sanur, a-krea, which i did shortly before christmas-year end break.
welcome 2011!
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November 2010
4 posts
.
i would’ve written in more sophisticated form, i would
for you i would’ve
done so many.
but the truth, and only the entire truth was that
you could’ve had everything i have,
since it was truly yours and yours
only to begin with
i only ever wanted the days when we were us,
but it’s a past tense sentence now.
i am exhausted and drained
from pretending since my early age
and the reason it...
3 tags
on a sunday...
brass workshop at bangli. supplier-browsing day.
afterwards we went to see the brass workshop owner’s uncle, who makes all sorts of stuff from old oil drums. he and his large family live in a big ranch inside a bamboo forest. it was the most amazing place.
how to actually get to the drums guy’s place:
wayan parsa is a simple balinese man but he showed no signs of confusion...
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the spaces in between.
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to ashes.
stayed at ubud from monday to attend the cremation ceremony (ngaben) of ida dwagung of puri peliatan ubud. it was interesting—ubud, these days, while not as i remembered it was like few years ago when i used to visit as a child (and waaaay before the whole eat, pray, love explosion) still manages to give me a certain shiver. the ngaben event was on tuesday (yesterday), but the procession...
October 2010
1 post
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come to think of it, we're all technically living...
i temporarily moved out and relocated to bali. the whole air of working creatively is a lot better here. proof: i woke up every morning and 6 am and don’t stop working until i sleep at 11 pm. (wait. that sounds… not so different from living in the capital city, save for the traffic. hmm. crap.)
will (try to) be blogging work, art, and unimportant daily stuff a bit...
September 2010
2 posts
.
my, sir, the only correct embodiment should’ve been wrong. well, and wanker.
baby should’ve taken that chance two years ago.
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of room and memories.
they painted my room orange once, they wrote the wrong code down.
it was supposed to be red, red like the surge of positivity through your lumbars, red like it was to right something wrong.
i think it brought my clausnophobia back from my childhood.
everything in my room went bad very quickly. i can’t tell you how many half-drank milk boxes that was only opened in the morning and had to...
August 2010
1 post
2 tags
golden years
me, 6 years old. in a play as an angel. yes. it certainly deserved to be documented. i have a new home at lomography.com. it’s under the name sangrmahlia. posted there are my works using my Holga 120 CFN (apparently now there are many types.) so…yeah.
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July 2010
1 post
1 tag
words.
word [wurd] 1. one or more spoken sounds carrying meaning and forming a basic unit of speech 2. the written representation of this 3. a. the text of a song b. quarrel 4. something said 5. promise 6. command
words words words words words words words, words
words words words words words words words words words words words words,
words words words words words words words words
words words...
June 2010
2 posts
3 tags
milano, summer 2009.
old forgotten photos from my trip to milan last summer. these were found when i was cleaning up my room for a new desk, and i realized i had forgotten to scan this part of film.
this was taken in piazza del duomo, the third afternoon i was there. (so it was probably june 13th or 14th).
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drizzle
stranger, under a drizzle,
what a very strange sight to behold.
there was a time when, under a cold sun,
i closed my eyes
and a stranger came
arose from a haunting sleep, tall and
disarming,
wicked, behold,
he was a flicker, but of a pervading kind.
this morning the sun came early,
rays, silver in colour, bathed
in the odour of a now decaying somnolence,
awaken, at last, from dreams...
May 2010
1 post
.
THIS IS BULLSHIT.
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April 2010
1 post
3 tags
la chambre bleue
i just inherited a nikon D40x. a few shots from trial session:
more of this set here: le chambre bleue
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March 2010
1 post
2 tags
scripteh frenzeh
it’s been a wee quiet on updates here, i know, but i’ve been working on editing (well, no, basically burning the old one and about to rewrite it all over again) my screenplay project i told you about for the past couple of weeks. i’m even registered at script frenzy annual scriptwriting challenge. the challenge starts at april 1st, 2010, and goes on for 30 days, and 100 pages...
February 2010
1 post
3 tags
lomography loves indonesia: a photo exhibition
on saturday i went to the opening night event of the lomonesia’s LOMOGRAPHY LOVES INDONESIA exhibition, at grand indonesia, first floor east mall. the familiar jakarta traffic and rain hampered me for a while but as i made my way through the amazing crowd i realized it was well worth it…
the crowd that turned up was, first of all, wonderfully crazy. it was a lovely surprise to see...
January 2010
4 posts
3 tags
kneecaps and a mandible
i added a section called secret files in my gallery. it’s a compilation of travel photos i took with a digital camera (which, surprise, surprise, i have. i’m not completely against digital photography.)
seminyak beach / venice canale
sam / borough market
camberwell school of art / a curious guy in front of tate modern
liberty building / architectural association school
london...
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the architecture of my sleep
yashica + ilford pan f 50. jakarta, late 2009. (i just found the negatives again and decided to scan them this morning)
more here
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thoughts on tits
i thought every man and his mother have their own sets of tits, but apparently men could never get used to nipples.
(on the other hand, i would be appalled and feel insulted if a man takes a look at my breasts and is indifferent.)
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if when you close one eye and you can’t see the half darkness of the closed lid, it’s because it is too dark compared to the glitz your other eye is seeing.
December 2009
5 posts
2 tags
my balls feel like a pair of maracas
highlights from the sketches and paintings & illustrations sections of my gallery of selected works.
for noise’s AD4ARTIST curation, 2007
self-lick study sketch, 2007
deaf and blind and dumb and born to follow, 2008
harsh but fair from the drenches series, 2008
bunny ears rule the world, 2008
whilst we kiss the sky from musically inclined series, 2009
wash you out of...
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sweet smell of sunshine, i remember sometimes.
as black as the night can get, everything is safer now.
there’s always a way to forget once you learn to find a way how.
in the blur of serenity where did everything get lost?
the flowers of naivete buried in a layer of frost.
thought he had it all before they called his bluff
found out that his skin just wasn’t thick enough
wanted to go back to how it was before
thought he...
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all in time to be jolly
christmas dinner images from 2005 taken with holga using a 120 mm neopan 100 film.
my christmas lunch will be on the 26th, as apparently, for christmas, everyone vouched for shopping instead. will be taking pictures. updates soon.
have a jolly x!
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the white fog who blanketed lake como
ilford sfx 200, 35 mm, using holga 120 cfn.
more at light leaks and things section at my gallery (bottom of the line)
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i want to be like you, just like an animal
i am a rock, black as the colour of your teeth
i am a rock, still as the surface of your skin
i’m afraid of all things liquid like you
i am a rock, sometimes i can’t tell the difference
i am a rock in a field of the fallen clouds
and everything else that has gone black like you
i’m afraid of all things liquid like you
i’m afraid of the way you swim through
maybe...
November 2009
8 posts
3 tags
you and me, we are a universe of blushing cheeks
the sun has been shy, lately, i noticed,
as we have been to ourselves.
the cliff where we used to sit, our small feet
hanging towards the indefinite harm
of the unknown floor, i notice, too,
it has been cracking slowly
towards its own feet.
the evenings i spent these past weeks
scratching my back, my stomach, the
skin stretched across my protruding ribcage,
south of my navel and next...
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cliff dwelling
the sound of the stone falling astonished him,
then the stunning size of it, the earth,
the green mesa surrounding itself with weather.
thunder echoed down the canyon in a way reminding
him of the culvert near what was once home
and his father’s far voice echoing him
back for diner. and lightning against the purple,
and twelve ravens exactly weaving and wafting
themselves to this...
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life in mono.
some of my favorite articles from monocle magazine. i stack my copies of old issues on the attic, but i scan my favorite articles so i can read them any time free of hassle.
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to the tomb of my ancestors!
i traveled to west and central java last october, in search of my long lost ancestry.
actually, i was just visiting my great-uncles and great-aunts. that was just more exciting to type down.
for the first time while traveling i brought along my 635 yashicaflex, all six pounds of it. it was a very eye-opening experience as it was a completely different system to what i’m used to in holga;...
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oh, isn't this wild.
(excerpt from the afterhour draft script i’m working on)
EXT. NIGHT CLUB PARKING LOT – NIGHT
Iggy Pop’s Nightclubbing can be heard with a low volume.
the group walks outside. the boys are walking together. GIRL 1 and GIRL 3 walk hand-in-hand, very friendly. GIRL 1 can seem to keep up with GIRL 3’s antics. GIRL 1 has another cigarette on one hand, this time it’s just been lit. she...
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bollocky wankshite.
so what is it about the british television series skins that tick me? i’m not sure. probably because 16-year-old characters are potrayed by actual 16-year-olds. probably because they don’t look so impossibly good-looking it makes you want to jump off the roof (i feel that way about dustin milligan. he’s so impossibly beautiful i want to just give up). probably because the...
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enam kaleng schweppes
i found a sudden courage.
here’s my very old short story, the one i mentioned a couple of weeks ago. it’s written in bahasa indonesia, and was featured in a literature anthology published by my high school bahasa teacher. it was written five years ago. i re-read it about a month ago, and i was mildly humiliated. now i’m extremely horrified by it, but fuck it. enam kaleng...
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far magazine feature
i was featured in far magazine’s october/november issue in their nation on a mission spread. the photos are from my early 2009 japan collection and late 2008 jakarta collection, but it’s still cool.
more photos can be seen in the mag. and because i’m very helpful, this is the cover of the issue that i was featured in:
cheers.
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October 2009
7 posts
2 tags
again, it's you.
time passes by so quickly without you. it’s perhaps because i close my senses to the world whenever you’re not here. the street words buzzling with lights and paranoia blur together into a porridge of truth: i am scared and i am bold both without you. do i not miss you? sometimes i wonder. sometimes i wonder if the pace of time i’m running past is a silent but obvious clue to...
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steam: a fogged memory
i remember a tiny notebook i brought into the steam room once in a while, now wavy to the extreme end, shaped and stretched by humidity and then preserved by dryness.
months later i decided to read the rule board of the steam room attached to the entry door for the first time, and i realized bringing in papers was not allowed.
“there are no faces in the steam room.”
only figures....
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dry clots getting to me.
day five of post-surgery for my top left wisdom tooth. now i can’t clench my teeth more than ever.
but on the upbeat side, this has been a very lazy monday for me, a fact i am mostly proud of. of course, as with all things i am proud of, they never really eventually get me anywhere. but that doesn’t matter.
inspired by glass orgy woman a.k.a andina, and my forever-unfinished cv (as i...
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so i stand here, perpetually waiting.
i redecorated my bedroom. well, not really, i just changed the wall paint decoration on the back of my bed (that serves as a trompe l’oeil bedpost) from raging red to very dark brown; supposedly i was changing the angsty mood i kept having into a more calm, rested peace, but after a while i became a bit too rested—in other word, and for lack of more intellectual-sounding one, lazy.
so...
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tantang tirani?
the longer version of the previous trial video. tantang tirani from putri daskian on Vimeo.
so…yeah.
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this is it.
i’m actually loving michael jackson’s posthumously released single.
i have a new portfolio on behance! it would feature a more strict selection of my work. plus it has nicer layout. so check me out, appreciate me, hire me. cheers.
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on the fistful fight against tyranny
the stairs, lamps and my personal bathroom in my house.
over tika and the dissidents’ tantang tirani. tyranny from putri daskian on vimeo.
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